A Man's True Colors

I moved to Kirkland, Washington, almost two years ago.  I moved here, because  I was in love with a man, who currently lives here, from Camden.  He and I had a long distance relationship.  I visited here a couple of times, then decided to make it permenant.  He had asked me to marry him and I thought our future together was certain.   But our relationship was volatile and very unhealthly.  But it was still a relationship.  We told each other things we hadn't told anyone else, we planned our future, we said the "I love you's" and had sex.  Everything that a relationship entails.

 

I quickly realized our relationship was based on money.  For the first 7 or 8 months I lived here I paid his storage unit fee 4 months in a row.  I paid a CPA to do his taxes.  I paid his electric bill. On several occasions I gave him cash.  I bought him clothes, 2 televisions, towels for his bathroom and constantly bought him and the boys take out for dinner and brought him lunch a lot.  I bought his boys an x-box and several hundred dollars worth of games.  I gave him money to give to them for Christmas.  I gave and gave and I got nothing in return.  All I wanted was his love and I never got it.  Once, after being released from the hospital I was told not to drive.  I asked him to pick me and he showed up 2 hours later as I was walking to my car.

 

We finally ended the relationship, but stayed in contact.  We both started dating other people, but during this time I still loved him and he said he still loved me.  We both knew it just wasn't working.  I wanted him to show me he loved me and he couldn't.  I was tired of the words I wanted action. He kept calling and texting, he wanted me to invest in his Glove Co.  I told him over and over I couldn't work with someone I loved.  He assured me time and time again that he wouldn't break my heart and that we could work on the glove company and our relationship at the same time.  He told me over and over again he was not in love with anyone else.  He said "let's take things day by day and you will see, everything will be fine."  I didn't believe him. Bruce and I had broken up twice over Eddie.

I just can't get into the details of how bad mine and Eddie's relationship truly was.  But we had not been together in almost a year.  The only time we ever spoke during the past year was about his company.  We had both moved on and even a friendship was hard to maintain.

 

A couple of days ago, someone left (according to Eddie) a very mean message on Lisa's (his girlfriends) answering  machine.  He texted me and said I was "classless, mean and evil"   Even though, I told him it wasn't me, he said he knew it wasn't me because it wasn't my voice but I probably knew who it was . This was not true.  I was so hurt.  I was undergoing treatment for an illness at this time and he knew it.  The "drama" in his life was more important to him then my actual life.  I couldn't believe it.  Over the next couple days he sent me nasty texts about contacting her.  He would not listen to my plea's that I was not involved.  The final straw was the following:

 

Bonnie,

I don't know what you are talking about. We are not a couple never been a couple never will be a couple. There is no attraction for me,, you are not my type never have been. I was your friend on the phone listening to your health issues.   I told you if you wanted to invest in Tahoe we could work together and be partners.
I think your motives are much more than a simple investment or partnership.
This is crazy, what are you doing, please don't contact me again.
If you or if you had a friend are fucking with Lisa knock it off.!!
I love her very much. She is a good women better than I deserve

Eddie
 

Sent from my Motorola ATRIX™ 4G on AT&T
 
I read this over and over.  I just didn't know what to think. Why would he write such a thing.   Finally, it hit me.  He had blind copied this to her trying to show her I was the one harrassing him and he had put a stop to it.  I can't tell you how hurt I was.  People kept telling me over and over again that he was using me.  Bruce especially and friends from Camden.  But I wouldn't listen.  But this, this finally proved to me what type of man he really is.
 
 I did call her after I read this and leave her a message.  I told her what kind of guy he really is.  He is just fake.  I won't say here everything I said, but I pointed out to her every detail about him that is just not true, from the reason he left his last two jobs  (one he had for over 25 years) to the reason he is renting a condo and his ex-wife lives in their house by the lake.  I reduced myself to his level.  I told her how hurt I was that he belittled our relationship and just out and out lied.
 
Hours later I felt bad and called her back and left another message apologizing.  I told her I was not mad at her.  But I couldn't understand his behavior.  Salvaging his relationship with her meant more than my feelings.   He should have been a man and told me how he felt along time ago.  He should not have kept promising me things.  I don't understand his desperation.  He could have told me he loved her.  He could have been honest with her about me.  He could have told her our relationship was over, well over a year ago.  Instead he chose the coward, lying way out.  I've lost all respect for him.  But in the end I was right.  I told him all along our relationship was based on money and nothing else.  I can't find any comfort in the fact that I was right. Nor, do I find comfort in the fact that now I see his true colors.  I do take comfort in knowing I now no longer love him.  I just keep praying that God will remove this hatred for him from my heart.  
 
I emailed, Eddie and apologized for calling Lisa.  Of course, I didn't get a reply and I know he will never apologize for his behavior, but that's fine.  I know I was wrong to stoop to such a hateful level, but I did apologize.   
 
 The saddest part of all this is, Bruce.  I met the most wonderful man.  Eddie does not compare to him in anyway.  Bruce and I broke up twice over Eddie and that breaks my heart.  His dishonesty and lies kept me from a man that truly loved me.  I finally see his true colors but its too late.  Bruce is gone.